"War on Christmas"?

Have you heard? According to all sorts of frustrated, angry, flustered people, there is a war on... a war that shouldn't be happening, and they're out to protest until it stops. No, not the war in Iraq... it's the...

WAR AGAINST CHRISTMAS!!!
~ insert dramatic music here ~

Read the news article here.

Now, don't get me wrong... I have a lot of respect for people who are upset about an unjust, uncalled for war run by a maniacal power and feel they must speak out lest it go on and on. You might say I have a little experience in that particular field. But... take a look at this particular gripe: the folks picketing WalMart (and many others pervading our media this HOLIDAY season) are citing as the grounds for their fury that people and organizations are saying "Happy Holidays." Thier gripe? This MUST be because those people are trying to eliminate Christmas! Oh, the poor poor oppressed Christians... you can understand their exhasperation, as Christianity is such an oppressed minority in the world, right? Oh... sorry... my bad. I figured with the way they have been acting that they must be.

Here's what really gets me: choosing language like "Happy Holidays" does NOT say anything anti-Christian whatsoever - it just says "I understand there are many people who will read this message, some of them celebrate Hannakuah, Kwanza, or Ramendan (the Flying Spaghetti Monster Holiday, and I want all of them, as WELL as the Christians, to know that I hope they have a pleasant time celebrating their beliefs this month."

This protest itself is saying something, too. These protesters are really saying, "We will not be happy until we DOMINATE and DISCRIMINATE and ALIENATE those who do not hold the same beliefs as us." I'm a Christian, and these loudmouth buffoons sending that message give US a bad name. I'm not without seasonal spirit, though, so I'll spare this blog a full rant, and even extend to the Santa wannabe shown in the picture above a hearty HAPPY HOLIDAYS.

There is something to fear, though...

I just saw on the news last night, and again this morning, a business that is threatening the true meaning of the season. That new internet business is Toyswap.com. In an attempt to serve parents frustrated with the purchase of high cost toys every year while previous years' toys sit idle in the closet, this company allows registered users to list their available slightly used toys and match up with people looking to unload slightly used toys they would like. They then ship the toys to each other, and everyone's happy, right?

WRONG!

Children know... the true meaning of the holidays is the avarice-filled lust for acquisition of further objects to demonstrate high status. Not only does "swapping" fail to bring in the high-status evoking idolatry that children are clamoring to use as social ladder climbing tools when school reopens (this year's badge of middle class honor is an "XBox 360"), but it completely defeats the general purpose of acquisition of wealth! You don't accumulate candy canes by trading three cherry for three peppermint... you only accumulate candy canes by retaining your three cherry WHILE you ALSO snatch up an additional three peppermint. Have some holiday spirit, parents! Spend, spend, spend. Didn't you know that your kids won't know you love them unless you buy them a Dora the Explorer nosehair trimmer?